Change Up Read online
Page 17
“I do,” she said through her tears. We broke our embrace and smiled at each other.
“I need to go pack,” I said to her. “I have to leave tonight and drive to Cincinnati. I’ll give you a call tomorrow. It probably won’t be until after the game.” I got up to leave, and Izzy got up with me, taking my hand. We walked out into the living room together where Mom and Dad were sitting.
“Okay,” I said to everyone. “I need to get my stuff and get on the road to Cincinnati if I want to be able to get there and get some sleep tonight before going to the stadium in the morning.” I walked over and gave Mom a hug.
“Have a safe drive, Wes” she said to me as she hugged me back.
“Thanks, Mom.” I looked over at Dad and went and gave him a hug too.
“Good luck,” Dad said to me.
“Thanks for everything, Dad,” I whispered to him.
“It’s what father’s do,” Dad said to me with a smile. “Send me a text when you get to Cincy.”
“Me too,” Izzy chimed in, coming over and giving me another hug.
“I will, I promise,” I told both of them.
“I love you Dad,” Izzy said softly to me.
“I love you too, sweetie,” I said, feeling choked up.
I walked out to my car and drove it up the hill to the house. All my baseball gear was still in the trunk of my car, so all I needed was some clothing to have to help me get started on the road. I could always send for my things once I got settled somewhere. As I packed my last suitcase, I gave Randy a call.
“That was more than five minutes,” Randy said to me with an edge to his voice. “What’s going on?”
“I just had to talk things over with Izzy first,” I told him. “I’m just finishing packing now. I’ll be on the road in a little bit.” I looked at my watch and saw it was a bit past eight. “Can you book me a hotel for the night? I should be there around 1 AM?”
“I’ll get right on it, pal,” Randy said happily. “I’ll make sure the contracts are there for you at the stadium in the morning, so you can take your physical and get right into uniform. Call me if you need anything else. Congrats, Wes; you’re back!”
Randy hung up with me as I zipped closed the small bag I had for my toiletries. I grabbed my two suitcases and a garment bag and left the house, making sure to turn the alarm system on before I went. I put the bags in the trunk of my car, set my GPS for the Renaissance Hotel in Cincinnati near the ballpark and got ready to go.
I reached the end of our road and thought for a second before I made the turn to head out towards I-70 to get to Cincinnati. I went towards Main Street instead, knowing I had one stop to make before I left town.
23
Kristin
The time I spent with Karen was just what I needed to get my mind off everything with Wes. Karen and I spent the day walking around the mall, doing more window shopping than actual shopping, and just laughing and having a good time. We got plenty of stares and looks everywhere we went, with everyone from teenage girls to older couples looking at us like we were crazy. Karen convinced me to go with her into different stores to try on dresses and clothes that we had no intention of buying, just to see what it was like to wear $500 dress or a ridiculous pair of heels that I would fall in at the library.
After shopping we went to lunch at one of those casual restaurant places where you can get five-dollar frozen drinks and cheesecakes the size of your head. We were giddy with excitement with each drink that came and probably made our waiter a little uncomfortable with the not-so-subtle flirting that Karen did with him. I made sure to leave him a good tip to make up for our silliness, including Karen leaving her cell phone number written on one of the napkins at our table for the waiter, “or anyone else,” which she said loudly.
We thought about going to a movie but decided to do some laser tag instead. I couldn’t remember the last time I did anything like that, but there we were, strapped into our laser vests, rolling around and hiding from the preteen boys trying to shoot us. Neither one of us could do anything because as soon as we tried to shoot there were five twelve-year-old sharpshooters there to take us down. Even with our loss, I still had the time of my life.
By the time we left the mall, it was already evening, closing in on seven o’clock, and we decided to call it a day since we both had work tomorrow. We giggled our way back to my car and piled in, making sure not to forget the extra helpings of cheesecake we ordered to go so we had a snack for later tonight.
We were on the road for just a few minutes when Karen flipped on the radio to listen to some music. Naturally, we sang along with every song that came on the whole way, singing at the top of our lungs and even opening the car windows so cars passing us could hear our voices. When we got closer to Chandler, and it got closer to eight, the news came on at the top of the hour. Normally, I don’t pay much attention to it as the news is never good, but when they went over the sports section and mentioned that the Reds had thumped the Pirates, they also threw in a brief news blurb about how the Reds first baseman broke his wrist, and they wouldn’t be surprised if Wes Martin were their first choice to replace him.
Karen looked over at me after she heard the news report. I had managed to get through the whole day with focusing on Wes, and here it was being dragged back in front of me. Only now, it seemed like he was going to be leaving town quickly.
“Well, I guess that answers any questions for me,” I said to Karen as I turned off the radio.
“Kris, that story doesn’t mean anything,” Karen told me. “Just because they’re thinking about him doesn’t mean the team will make it happen.”
“Maybe it’s better this way,” I said as we made our way down past Martin Way on Route 5. I looked over at the lit driveway outside Wes’ parent’s house and didn’t see his SUV parked there. “If he was going to leave anyway, I didn’t want to get wrapped up in a relationship, right?” I think I was saying it more to convince myself than anything else.
“Sure,” Karen said, not sounding as certain about it as I wanted her to be. “He could be gone for six months. There’s no telling what could happen in that time.”
“Right,” I said, not sounding so sure anymore. I drove the few blocks past my apartment to drop Karen off at her place. Before she hopped out, I leaned over and gave her a hug.
“Thanks for today, Karen,” I said to her, trying not to get all mushy and weepy again. “I had so much fun.”
“I’m glad I could help,” she told me as she picked up the bag of cheesecake. “Now to finish off my night right,” she said as she ogled the cheesecake bag. “I’ll see you in the morning.”
I watched her walk into her home, and then took the short drive back over to my apartment. I was just getting out of my car, bag in hand, when a pair of headlights came barreling into the parking lot, briefly blinding me. The car came to a stop right behind mine in the lot. Once I could focus, I could see the familiar outline of the SUV and Wes as he got out of the car.
I closed the door to my car and took a deep breath as Wes walked over to me.
“Kristin, I know you said you didn’t want to see me, but I had to talk to you, and you’re not answering your phone or returning texts, so here I am.”
“I shut my phone off, Wes,” I said to him as I tried to walk past him. “I just needed some time to clear my head of… of everything.”
“Kristin, please,” Wes said as he held my arm. “Look I know everything got messed up, and you have no idea how sorry I am about all that. I’m leaving town. Now. I have to go to Cincinnati.”
So it was true, I thought to myself.
“I… I heard that on the radio a little bit ago that you might be going there. Congratulations. I hope you do well there.” I tried to keep walking again, but Wes stood in front of me.
“I don’t want to leave like this,” Wes said to me. “I can’t leave like this.”
“What do you want from me, Wes?” I said raising my voice. “You have too many ob
stacles in your life right now. I just don’t see where I fit into all of this.”
“Come with me,” Wes said to me. “Come to Cincinnati with me and stay with me. Maybe if we just had some time away from all this, we can work things out. You’ll get a chance to see… to see how much you mean to me.”
I was stunned that he had asked me to go with him. I never expected him to say that at all, and I stood there for a moment unable to answer him.
“Kristin?” Wes said softly. He took my hand in his and held it.
I shook my head to clear the cobwebs. “Wes, I can’t just pack up and leave,” I said to him. “I have a job, an apartment, and responsibilities here.”
“You don’t have to worry about any of that,” he said to me. “I can take care of all that stuff for you.”
I let go of Wes’ hand. “But this is my life, Wes. Just throwing some money at it doesn’t change the fact that I would have to give up what I love doing… and to do what? Follow you around like a lovesick teenager from city to city with no one around me and nothing to do? I can’t do that. And what about Isabelle? Nothing has changed with her, has it? You think she’s upset now. Imagine how she would be when she finds out I ran off to Cincinnati to be with you while she is home. You can’t ask me to live my life that way.”
Wes stared down at me. I think he was shocked that I had said no to him. Part of me wanted to just jump in the car with him and go, just to see what would happen. The realistic part of my brain knew nothing good could come of that.
“I don’t understand,” Wes said to me, trying not to let me go.
“It’s better this way, Wes,” I said to him, bringing my hand up to his face. I could feel tears building up, starting all the way down in the pit of my stomach until they came up and out, stinging my eyes. “Go to Cincinnati and keep your career going. In a few weeks, you’ll have forgotten about me.”
“That’s not going to happen,” Wes said, a hint of desperation in his voice now.
“It has to happen, Wes. Let me forget about you.” I reached up and gave him a light kiss on the lips and then ran towards the steps, up and into my apartment and closing the door quickly. I didn’t even want to look out the window to see if he was still there or not. I was sobbing again, and it was more than I could take. I even resisted the temptation to turn my phone on again.
After a minute or two, I heard a car door slam, and the sound of a vehicle leaving the parking lot. When I looked out the window into the night, I could see that Wes’ SUV was gone.
You did the right thing, I told myself repeatedly.
“So why doesn’t it feel like it?” I said out loud as I sat on the couch, feeling hurt again.
24
Wes
The ride to Cincinnati was, to put it plainly, miserable. A four-hour ride anywhere is not usually a pleasant thing, and after the long ride back to Pennsylvania from Florida just a few days ago, I don’t know what I was thinking by believing the drive now would be okay. If anything, I had even more to think about now than on the way back from Florida.
I was absolutely excited for the opportunity to get back into playing ball. I felt like I still had a lot I could contribute to a team. I knew I could have an impact, and I was anxious to show it. Starting over with a new team was going to be odd for me. I had spent my whole adult life in the Pittsburgh organization, and now everything was going to be new. It wasn’t going to be like when I was starting out as a rookie since I had a track record to fall back on, but it was still going to take some adjustment.
Everything that happened with Kristin was weighing heavily on my mind as well. I was so sure she would be willing to come with me, to give us time to sort everything out together, be with each other, and hopefully grow closer. When she said no to me, it was crushing. I felt like all the good feelings I had about going to Cincinnati were torn out from under me. I could see that she had a life she was establishing in Chandler, but it was all still new to her, and she was young. Isn’t that the time to do things like this? To take risks?
Maybe Kristin was right. Maybe I needed this time to forget about her, focus on my career again and my family. I spent so many years playing and trying to build my career, I had obviously let my family life slip away from me. First, it was Rachel that went away, and now Isabelle was falling away from me as well, right before my eyes. I couldn’t let that happen, and I had to make a concerted effort to do things differently and show her I can be the father she wants me to be, and I need to be for her, even if I was hundreds or thousands of miles away.
At one point during the road trip, I thought about turning around, going back to Chandler, and just calling it quits. Maybe it was time to spend my life caring for Izzy, helping my parents, making sure Mom was okay, and that Dad had help with the farm… just living a quiet life for a change. After focusing on all of that, then I could pay more attention to my personal life, and maybe, if Kristin were still around, she would want to be part of that. Life might fall into place better that way.
It was then I realized that doing that might make me happy for the moment, but I would still feel like my life was unfinished. I had to see if I could still do this and make my mark. I didn’t want to be remembered as the guy who hit .150 in spring training and just disappeared.
And so, I pressed on to Cincinnati. I got a glimpse of the stadium as I drove past it on my way to the hotel and got the same old feeling of excitement I always got when near the place we were playing. I arrived at the hotel at about 1 AM and got myself checked in, getting into my room comfortably. There was a nice welcome note from the Reds in the room, along with instructions to get to the stadium at around 9 AM for a physical and then to sign a contract.
I sat down on the bed and took my phone out, looking to see if there were any messages from anyone. I had a few texts from old teammates saying congratulations. Word travels around fast, even if it is just rumored, so I wasn’t surprised to see the texts. I sent a quick text to Randy to let him know I was in Cincinnati and then texted Dad to let him know I arrived safely. He sent a brief note of thanks back to me and said he would talk to me tomorrow after the game.
I sent another message to Izzy to let her know I was okay and that I loved her. I expected her to be sleeping, but she sent back a smiling emoji to me almost immediately. I texted back, telling her to go to sleep.
I thought about trying to send one more text to Kristin, but I knew it wasn’t likely she would answer me. I didn’t know what else I could say to her anyway. I felt at a loss when it came to her. Maybe the next move I make is to do just what she wanted – give her the time and space to forget about me.
Exhaustion started to get the better of me. I set my phone alarm for 8 AM, and I crawled further up on the bed and put my head down to get some sleep. Sleep came quickly to me as the day had taken a lot out of me and I was ready to turn the page and move on to other things in my life.
The alarm sound went off, and 8 AM came a lot quicker than I had expected it to. I was grateful that the weather looked nice when I glanced out my hotel window, and a mix of nervousness and excitement filled me as I got ready to start the day. I took a shower and put a suit on, wanting to at least look good when I got to the ballpark. I grabbed the two bags with my gear and headed out of the hotel.
On any other day, I would have walked the few blocks over to the stadium. The weather was perfect, with abundant sunshine and the weather already in the fifties, with it expected to go higher for game time this afternoon. However, I had too much stuff to carry with me, and the concierge at the hotel kindly arranged for a car to pick me up and take me over.
I got to the stadium, went through security and headed up to the offices for the team and take care of paperwork. Felix Burton, the team GM, greeted me happily. He was a young man, not much older than me, short and stocky, with thinning brown hair. He gave me a firm handshake and brought me into his office.
“I’m glad you could get here so quickly Wes,” Felix told me as he sat down. �
�We were in a real bind with Bob’s injury. I think you can be a big help to us. How are you feeling?”
“I feel great,” I told him, which was only a white lie. Physically, I was in great shape. Mentally, I wasn’t sure if I was there.
“Perfect,” he said as he got his paperwork together. “I just need you to sign these contracts, and we’ll be good to go, right after your physical.”
I took a brief look at the contract, and it seemed standard to me. I assumed Randy had read all the small print since that was his job. The Reds were only on the hook for $535,000 of my contract for this year. Pittsburgh was still picking up the bulk of the 15 million dollars I was owed for this season. I signed on the dotted line and handed everything back to Felix.
“Great,” Felix said, standing up. “Let’s get you downstairs for the physical and once that’s done, we have a brief PR thing scheduled with the press about the signing. Is that okay with you?”